


The Agonies of Being Agatha - In the 61st Sweep of the Era of Benevolent Rationality

by RainofLittleFishes



Series: The Era of Benevolent Rationality [1]
Category: Homestuck
Genre: Alternian bioengineering, BellCurveBent, Era of Benevolent Rationality, Hemospectrum Shift, Humor, Lewd language, Nepotism, OCs - Freeform, Original Troll Characters, Plotting Murder, Racism, Troll Culture, Vignette, alternative universe, because everything Alternian can probably kill you and eat your heart, if you’re looking for plot – move along
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-06-20
Updated: 2014-06-20
Packaged: 2018-02-05 12:47:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1819027
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/RainofLittleFishes/pseuds/RainofLittleFishes
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>In The 61st Sweep of the Era of Benevolent Rationality, a Rust Plots Murder, a Violet is Not Missed, a Green Escapes Murder, and a Teal is Stood Up.</p>
            </blockquote>





	The Agonies of Being Agatha - In the 61st Sweep of the Era of Benevolent Rationality

Your IDchit reads “Agatha” and that is quite sufficient.

You are also late, and more annoyed than you expected.

It is one week to the night since your young violet waste hauling partner was replaced with a Plucky Green and two drones. This was not an improvement. Your trundlebeetlebeast, affectionately known in the privacy of your mind as the BR BovineSchist Bucket, has been agitated all week at the change. Your consumption of sweetweed cigarillos had doubled, and doubled again. You’ve had to switch to cheap rolled sacchaworms. The aftertaste makes you grind your teeth.

The violet had been growing on you like a mild and apologetic cave fungus, not the brightest clump in the caverns, but sort of sweet. You’re a Rust, and sugars are a known weakness. You’d still shank anyone who pointed it out.

You discourage chitchat, but when he forgot himself, the Violet hummed. His harmonics were not intolerable. In another sweep or two, you might have addressed him by name. You are clearly getting soft in your old age.

Plucky Green has been exploring new territories on top of your last nerve. You have calculated a new way of killing them at each stop since the last hive district. You are up to 58, and you are already 15 minutes behind schedule for your nightly terrorization of the pedestrians at the intersection of the Exuberant Flopfishlesses Fountain. If you are not on time, they might grow lax, and you might maim one accidently. You hate inefficiency.

Additionally, you have been not-flirting with the Teal Legislacerator on duty for the past sweep and you think they’ve almost caught on.

“You know those things will kill you, right?” Plucky Green has popped back into the front compartment for the trip to the next hive district. The drones are hooked back onto your trundlebeetlebeast’s butt. It shivers and sinks a bit in resignation. There’s a smell like nothing else as it farts in (mostly) silent protest.

You do not bother to ponder body disposal. The span of Plucky Green’s horns would clear the city regulated waste canisters by at least a half inchworm. The drones are probably well enough programmed to continue without their presence, but it would be annoying to be wrong.

You prod up the BS Bucket and light another worm.

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to BellCurveBent, an Alternate Alternia. 70 sweeps ago, the Summoner’s Revolution was successful, but the Summoner has subsequently passed and been succeeded by the Benevolent Rationality, in which Jades and Teals are the Authority. The middle classes are Yellows, Greens, and both official shades of Blue. Older Indigos who keep their heads down might get away without an official culler, younger ones emphatically do not. The same is true for Violets, now rare in the City. Rusts and Browns may be culled, but are more likely to maintain their independence so long as there are no incidents… provoked or unprovoked.  
> This is a teaser vignette to a longer set of as-yet-unfinished works in this universe.


End file.
